do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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