mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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