just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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