She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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