ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Let's get the cat blown out
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
