thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
He shit in the fireplace
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
