i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
