You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize