Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize