They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
