You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize