Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize