I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
