fuck your aforementioned shoe
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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