Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
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