Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Randomize
