he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You ruined the universe
Randomize
