I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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