Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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