We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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