ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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