She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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