I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
