woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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