You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
