This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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