Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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