I showed him my bush... on skype.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
