quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
