I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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