Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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