If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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