so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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