she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
