The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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