im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
