I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
