Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
