More tranny stories later!
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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