idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
