you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
