After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
