i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
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