Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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