He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Randomize
