why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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