You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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