maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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