Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
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