People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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