I'm jealous of your bromance
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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